Home. I have lived in my city for over 50 years. A long long time. So, I should not have any hesitation in calling it my home. But off late I have been asking myself where exactly is home? Where do I want to be?
Eight years ago, our two daughters left home within a span of a week . Both got into courses away from home and that was the first time the house seemed empty !( yes the home suddenly seemed just four walls ) It took us a while to get used to the emptiness but there were times to look forward to. Weekends, festivals, term holidays. Then the elder one got married and after a while their careers took them abroad, the younger one took a job in another city.
But she often flew down. That lasted three years, till she went to the US for her masters last year.
Now the two of us are like gypsies. While we closed our small office that we had for about 20 years, we have nothing to hold us down. We are content as of now, doing something at our pace so that we can pack our bags whenever the kids need us. We spent time with the elder one in London, when she had a baby last year. While I did miss the familiar faces and places, I felt quite at home. That surprised me !
The younger one graduates in a couple of months. After completion of the course she will return to India for a short period again, till she goes back to take on her new assignment. And this morning, her tickets were booked, and she called to say – Yay ! I am coming home soon.
That was the answer. I know even though the children have their separate lives, they need to return to their roots time and again, even though the visits are not that frequent and for shorter stays. It is after all their home. And ours.
Eight years ago, our two daughters left home within a span of a week . Both got into courses away from home and that was the first time the house seemed empty !( yes the home suddenly seemed just four walls ) It took us a while to get used to the emptiness but there were times to look forward to. Weekends, festivals, term holidays. Then the elder one got married and after a while their careers took them abroad, the younger one took a job in another city.
But she often flew down. That lasted three years, till she went to the US for her masters last year.
Now the two of us are like gypsies. While we closed our small office that we had for about 20 years, we have nothing to hold us down. We are content as of now, doing something at our pace so that we can pack our bags whenever the kids need us. We spent time with the elder one in London, when she had a baby last year. While I did miss the familiar faces and places, I felt quite at home. That surprised me !
The younger one graduates in a couple of months. After completion of the course she will return to India for a short period again, till she goes back to take on her new assignment. And this morning, her tickets were booked, and she called to say – Yay ! I am coming home soon.
That was the answer. I know even though the children have their separate lives, they need to return to their roots time and again, even though the visits are not that frequent and for shorter stays. It is after all their home. And ours.
lovely writing.. After reading this I'm desperately feeling to fly back to my home where I grew up.
ReplyDeleteYou must!
DeleteThe yearning for one's own home is very well expressed.I might have been in a great resort with its rich ambience or enjoyed my stay in the cool comfort of a five starred hotel but when I come back to my small home and hit the bed in my cramped bed room,I feel like the Rnglishman in his castle.Home,sweet home is indeed a right expression.
ReplyDeleteVery true. Though now it is not about the comfort. It can get lonely.
DeleteYes, it is theirs and your home...Family home. It happens to all middle aged people. We just wonder how we are living without them...but life goes on, sometimes waiting for their calls or emails. After sometime we get used to being alone! When they come back for holidays with their kids, we take time to be with 'crowd'...though they are our own children. We get used to being alone. This is happening with my sis in law. She keeps on talking about her daughter all the time and waits for her to come home when her children get school holidays. After a couple of days, she gets leg pain and starts feeling restless! After the daughter leaves...again talk about daughter! I have got a son with me. Daughter is different, I think!
ReplyDeleteLike you wonder about the 'daughter' bit , I have no clue about sons :-) But a child nevertheless. I guess it is the same. And yes, over a period of time we do get used to being by ourselves.
DeleteMy comment continues...and all of them, the parents, the daughter, her husband, kids...come home and stay with us! We have lost touch with crowds now, even though the niece was like a daughter to me and used to come and stay with us for all holidays and weekends too! Am I getting old?! The doubt crops up at these times!
ReplyDeleteThey are coming home this Friday...my niece already has given her farmaaish...'maami, I want your samosas and Parathas'!
"I felt quite at home. That surprised me !" therein lies the answer. Adapting to a new surrounding is the best way to carry on.
ReplyDeleteYes, but adapting as you get older is not easy. That is why the surprise !
DeleteI am coming to your blog after a long time. It is true, for a while the house does feel empty without the children, but then we get used to that. I feel quite nice being alone with my husband, I miss my children yet not miss them too. I know that they are happy leading their own lives, and that is enough for me.
ReplyDeleteWhenever I cook something that I know they like, I think of them.
I also come from my parent's home, but somehow, after my mother's death, that home really does not feel like home anymore.
I think it is the mother who really makes a home feel like home.
And I also want to taste my dear friend Snadhya's Samosas and Paranthas.
Very true. In all aspects. Yes, we do get used to living by ourselves over a period of time. And get set in our routine. The baby boomer generation is a confused lot !
DeleteLovely post :) And where you people are, will always be home for me.
ReplyDeleteThis post makes us reflect yet again about something we so much take for granted...Thanks, Radha.
ReplyDeleteThis is my predicament too. Clinging to my roots would perhaps draw my children to it. But how long can I cling on to it? I may have to let go at some point of time and I dread the day.
ReplyDeleteI haven't seen you around for sometime now! Hope you are doing well, Radha! Take care!
ReplyDeleteHappy New Year, Radha, to you and your family! Be happy always!
ReplyDeleteNo post from you for a long time.. hope you are fine..
ReplyDelete